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21 Types of Orchestral Players

Hey, um, sorry… Can I borrow your pencil? Thanks. Is that a HB pencil? It’s too light. It needs to be 2B at least. **2B at least** My eyes can’t see it. Yeah, can’t see it. Need 2B. Good one, mate? It’s triple P! (annoyed) Okay. Yeah, so what do you think of this part? It’s pretty elegant, isn’t it? What about this part? It’s like running into the sea… And swimming in the ocean… Hey, so, do you wanna grab lunch during the break? And the food…have you tried chicken? Oh my God, the chicken from Nando’s! And it’s– Guys, I just think it should be a bit lighter. But I know the concert master wants…what is it? It says pesante. Yeah, like okay, just- It’s gotta be like, “get with the concert master.” (??) You guys don’t understand the style of Vaughan Williams. Winds, can we rehearse from bar 54 to 68? That passage. You know, like, yeah, it’s just like dogs… They should have dog care for (???) … Like baby childcare, dogs? It’s amazing. Oh. Yeah, is your daughter okay? Oh, I’m so sorry… Oh, yeah, my- my girlfriend wanted me to go rock climbing But unfortunately… I couldn’t go, my friends, I just couldn’t go rock climbing You know what? You should come socialize. It’s a great experience. (You) gotta meet people you know Yeah… But I’m just wondering… With all that socialising, Where do you find the time to practice? *collective* It was amazing… I can’t hear, I can’t- The ghost- the ghost was the best – It’s amazing – I loved it, it was so much fun What was your favorite part? Um… I think when they are playing these different concertos… And having that duel ’cause the way they managed to mix that…it’s incredible – It was good? – Yeah What was your favourite part? The duets were good Yeah? There are a lot of duets though. Eddy’s face. LOL! That was your favourite part? You captured the moment… What did you guys think of the concert? *collective* It was amazing… Yeah? What is your favourite part? The Bach Double (violin concerto)… I liked the Bach Double (Violin Concerto)

Reynold King

100 Replies to “21 Types of Orchestral Players”

  1. 1 the type that talks shit
    2 the type who annoys everyone
    3 the type who is sarcastic af
    4 the dude who plays fast one every note like a jackass
    5 the kid who trolls you until u kick his ass
    6 the one who plays so slow messes all’s rhythms
    7 the guy who brings a base ball bat and breaks the instruments
    ( the biggest jerk I saw a year ago)
    8 the dude who talks nonstop
    9 the kid who talks like he’s better than everyone just to realize he’s not
    10 that one freaking kid who spams yo mama jokes when I’m trying to practice ;-;
    11 that kid who says can I borrow ur violin then throws it at wall so I get a brand new one for 1500 just to troll him
    12 that kid who brings cake to class and eats it in front of everyone
    13 the kid who spams no u meme
    14 the kid whos a big dick
    15 that kid who roasts the teacher

  2. Oh and the ones that never play but they all of a sudden start playing very loudly because they practiced it at home and think it sound good

  3. i’m not even in orchestra, i’m in jazz band but i just wanted to add you think there’s a player that plays too loud? tell that to the entire trumpet section in my band lol

  4. The one that can't play in time is the one at the last stand playing tchikofki 5th symphony or rachmaninov on the theme of paganini 24 caprice , sorry for wrong spelling _

  5. it’s triple p

    Now I’m not in the orchestra, but I am in band and I can tell you, thE TRUMPETS DO NOT UNDERSTAND DYNAMICS. I mean, shut up trumpeTS IT’S A TRIPLE P (you peasants)

  6. 10. THERE IS NEVER TOO LOUD IN JAZZ BAND! IF WE PLAY LOUD MAYBE THEY WILL THINK WE ARE GOOD! (I’m going to be in jazz band next year, my mentality is already great).

  7. I’d just like to say, I cannot count for the life of me and as a saxophone player in my orchestra it’s really embarrassing lol

  8. The FLIPPIN person that plays solos during the warm ups. The type of dude sits next to me. I despise him. CAUSE I CANT DO WHAT HE DOES!😐😑

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